11.08.2006

Big Events in the U.S.A.


Wow - it's been a big day. The election results; the Supreme Court hearing regarding partial birth abortion; Rumsfeld's "resignation"; the first woman as speaker of the house; and locally, the election of Massachusetts' first black governor.

And, let's not forget yesterday's earth-shattering announcement that Britney Spears is divorcing Mr. Federline. To borrow from The Onion, "A Shattered Nation Longs To Care About Stupid Bullshit Again." Case in point: despite all the crazy stuff happening in the world, Britney's decision came to my e-mail inbox in the form of a CNN.com alert. I mean really. Does CNN think I really care about this?? Clearly, Britney's decision is far from amazing - it's simply something that even a drunk, LCD-tripping monkey . . .no, wait, that's too smart...a drunk, LCD-tripping Paris Hilton could have called from the first day that Kevin asked Britney on a date. (It's a shame she had to bring two children in the world before figuring it out though).

I just spent four whole sentences on Ms. Spears - now 5 - so I guess I "care." Pfaa. I am watching the news right now, and I almost choked on my wine when one political pundit tried to tie the current political events to the demise of Ms. Spears' marriage. "I guess this is a message to president Bush to get out of Iraq as quickly as Britney ended her marriage to Kevin Federline." Who would have thought the "marriage" of these world events were at all related?

'Nuff said.

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